Why Love Hurts

Few of us have been spared the agonies of intimate relationships. They come in many shapes: loving a man or a woman who will not commit to us, being heartbroken when we're abandoned by a lover, engaging in Sisyphean internet searches, coming back lonely from bars, parties, or blind dates, feeling bored in a relationship that is so much less than we had envisaged - these are only some of the ways in which the search for love is a difficult and often painful experience. Despite the widespread and almost collective character of these experiences, our culture insists they are the result of faulty or insufficiently mature psyches. For many, the Freudian idea that the family designs the pattern of an individual's erotic career has been the main explanation for why and how we fail to find or sustain love. Psychoanalysis and popular psychology have succeeded spectacularly in convincing us that individuals bear responsibility for the misery of their romantic and erotic lives. The purpose of this book is to change our way of thinking about what is wrong in modern relationships. The problem is not dysfunctional childhoods or insufficiently self-aware psyches, but rather the institutional forces shaping how we love. The argument of this book is that the modern romantic experience is shaped by a fundamental transformation in the ecology and architecture of romantic choice. The samples from which men and women choose a partner, the modes of evaluating prospective partners, the very importance of choice and autonomy and what people imagine to be the spectrum of their choices: all these aspects of choice have transformed the very core of the will, how we want a partner, the sense of worth bestowed by relationships, and the organization of desire. This book does to love what Marx did to commodities: it shows that it is shaped by social relations and institutions and that it circulates in a marketplace of unequal actors.

“Every woman who is struggling to understand the mistreatment she is experiencing in her relationship should begin by reading [this] wonderful book.”—Lundy Bancroft, author of Why Does He Do That? What do you do when the one you love hurts you? Have you been searching for answers to difficult questions about your relationship? Do you feel confused about why your partner seems loving one moment and angry the next? Summoning the courage to ask these challenging questions can seem daunting. You know something is wrong in your relationship, but you are not sure what. If you are beginning to wonder if you are experiencing abuse, this book can offer you support, information, and, most of all, hope as you look for answers. Written by two women with a wealth of experience supporting victims of abuse, When Love Hurts introduces exercises and resources to help you make sense of your relationship, addressing all forms of abuse, including verbal, emotional, financial, sexual, and physical. This practical guidebook is a supportive and nonjudgmental friend to those who don’t know where to turn and is filled with stories from women who have been in the same position. By drawing on your own wisdom and that of the many others who have shared your experience, When Love Hurts can help you find the answers you have been looking for.

Buddhism has a lot to say about suffering—and there are likely few times we suffer more intensely than when we break up with a romantic partner. It feels like you may never recover sometimes. But Lodro Rinzler has wonderfully good news for those suffering heartbreak: the 2,500-year-old teachings of the Buddha are the ultimate antidote for emotional pain. And you don’t need to be a Buddhist for them to apply to you. In this short and compact first-aid kit for a broken heart, he walks you through the cause and cure of suffering, with much practical advice for self-care as you work to survive a breakup. The wisdom he presents applies to any kind of emotional suffering.

Malorie Blackman brings together the best teen writers of today in a romantic collection about love against the odds. Featuring short stories and extracts - both brand-new and old favourites - about modern star-crossed lovers from stars such as Gayle Forman, Markus Zusak, Patrick Ness and Andrew Smith, and with a new story from Malorie Blackman herself, Love Hurts looks at every kind of relationship, from first kiss to final heartbreak.

USA Today Best Selling Author, Willow Winters, brings you an all-consuming, sizzling romance featuring an epic, anti-hero you won't soon forget. Some love stories are a slow burn. Others are quick to ignite, scorching and branding your very soul before you’ve taken that first breath. You’re never given a chance to run from it. That’s how I’d describe what happened to us. Everything around me blurred and all that existed were his lips, his touch… The chase and the heat between us became addictive. Our nights together were a distraction; one we craved to the point of letting the world crumble around us. We should have paid attention; we should have known that it would come to this. We both knew it couldn’t last, but that didn’t change what we desired most. All we wanted was each other… Topics include: mafia romances, dark romance, dark romance mafia, alpha business man book, billionaire romance, billionaire romance series, possessive alpha romance, willow winters books, w. winters books, contemporary romance, contemporary, romance novels, survival romance, the best romance series ever, bestselling series, captive romance.

Alba, Texas. In 2008, Terry Caffey, a home health care aide and aspiring preacher, was asleep in his bedroom when he woke up to a barrage of bullets. His wife, Penny, was killed instantly. With blood pouring from five bullet wounds, among other serious injuries, Terry tried—but failed—to save his two youngest children before crawling out of his burning house. Meanwhile, Terry's sixteen-year-old daughter, Erin, was missing... Once Erin was found by local authorities, she claimed she had been kidnapped—but could not remember the details. It wasn't until Terry was fully conscious that he could explain what had really happened: He'd been shot, point-blank, by two young men. One of them he did not know; the other was Charlie James Wilkinson. Charlie was Erin's nineteen-year-old boyfriend, forbidden from entering the Caffey home. Until Erin helped Charlie come up with a plan to do away with her disapproving parents once and for all... Please note: This ebook edition does not contain photos that appeared in the print edition.

You might think, It's all very well saying 'self-love', but what does that mean, how do I actually go about doing it, and what does it have to do with my current problems? Self-love is not generic; it's as unique as your fingerprints and needs to be applied according to the battles that you're facing. This book is designed to wake you up, taking you on a journey where we break down why self-love is fundamental to your relationships and why getting 'woke' is the key that will revolutionise your love life. Discover why having 'a certain type' is a problem, how you inadvertently screw yourself over, and the unconscious processes that keep you repeating the same cycle again and again.You need this book if you:Feel baffled by your relationships and don't understand why loving someone results in so much pain.Settle for far less than you need and tolerate nonsense in the name of love.Struggle with having boundaries and feel that your partner (or ex) mistook your kindness for weakness.Always put your partner (or ex-partners) needs first and still end up feeling unwanted or unappreciated.Have started to become secretive about your love life and as a result, feel isolated and anxious.If you've answered, 'yes' to any of these, this book will provide the solace, comfort and insights that you have been looking for.Engaging, practical exercises expose the excuses that often keep you stuck, plus you will also gain invaluable insight into the process of change, how it occurs, why it's so hard and what you need to do to attain the love, that you know, at some level, you deserve. You will be guided and encouraged to see yourself as a work-in-progress so that you can choose self-compassion over self-condemnation. Light is at the end of the tunnel, and change is possible.More on the bookWhy Love Hurts is inspired by both my personal and professional experiences. Back in the late 90's I was in a 'give my all' relationship that resulted in domestic abuse. That experience changed my life exponentially and inspired my career. Today, I am a psychotherapist in private practice, and I am proud to bring my ideas and vision together in a book that comes from the heart, that breaks down why love hurts, what we can do about it, and how the change process really looks like.Bringing together years of knowledge and insights into an incredibly empowering read that has the potential to change your life, you will move beyond traditional self-help material and have an opportunity to do a deep dive into the unconscious dynamics that inform your intimate relationship patterns. This will provide you with crystal clear clarity about what steps need to be in place for you to revolutionise your life for you to experience the healthy, wholesome love that you know you deserve.

A fully revised and updated edition to a classic bestseller, The Macho Paradox is the first book to show how violence against women is a men's issue—and how all genders can come together to stop it. From the #MeToo movement to current discussions about gender norms in schools, sports, politics, and media culture, The Macho Paradox incorporates the voices and experiences of the women, men, and others who have confronted the problem of gender violence from all angles. Bestselling author Jackson Katz is a pioneering educator and activist on the topic of men's violence against women. In this revised edition of his heralded book, Katz outlines the ways in which cultural ideas about "manhood" contribute to men's sexually harassing and abusive behaviors and that men have a positive role to play in challenging and changing the sexist cultural norms that too often lead to gender violence. This important book for abused women covers topics ranging from mental and emotional abuse to sexual harassment to domestic violence and is a vital read for women with controlling partners or as a self-help book for men. Praise for The Macho Paradox: "A candid look at the cultural factors that lend themselves to tolerance of abuse and violence against women."—Booklist "If only men would read Katz's book, it could serve as a potent form of male consciousness-raising."—Publishers Weekly "These pages will empower both men and women to end the scourge of male violence and abuse. Katz knows how to cut to the core of the issues, demonstrating undeniably that stopping the degradation of women should be every man's priority."—Lundy Bancroft, author of Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men